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Dorks anon, or maybe not so anon...

Hi, my name is Stevie, and I'm a dork.

While on my recent foray to Rhode Island, I had occasion to visit Providence Place, a ginormous mall boasting some pretty cool stores like Tiffany's, Lord and Taylor, etc. We were there for Bed, Bath & Beyond, but that's ok. We'll be going back for other stuff.

One of the things I noticed when I was in RI was that everything, in terms of freeway signs, parks, streets, etc., seem very well...organized and neat and tidy. They've kind of figured out how to get a whole lot done in a teeny little bitty state, and they do it well.

Providence Place, then is a gorgeous mall, well organized, with great lighting, a lovely orange blossom scent in the air that reminds me of none other than the Palazzo in Vegas, and a plethora of stores in which to meander.

That their parking structure would also be organized and efficient follows.

That for some reason, while in the frenzy of finding a $1 bill (I had a $20, but that would have been stupid to break for a $1 parking fee and I'd heard the machines love to give change in those dollar coins which are a PITA to hold onto and use), inserting said bill and seeing the satisfying 'Parking fee paid in full' message which lit up the digital board, I somehow didn't know to wait for the next message, which was 'Pull your paid parking stub from the slot below.'

The unspoken next piece of that message? 'Lest you return to your car, load your trunk with bags and bags of purchases, slip into your comfy leather seat in your red Dodge Charger that you simply had to upgrade to for reasons nobody but you understood but that made perfect sense at the time of signing the rental agreement, turn on the ignition, and make your way to the exit....WITHOUT THE TICKET YOU NEED TO GET OUT OF THAT DAMNED GARAGE without mortal embarrassment and a tongue lashing from a fierce, dark Portuguese man who will not hesitate to let the entire exit line know what a rookie you are at the whole properly using a parking facility in Rhode Island thing.'

Honestly. How have I made it as far as I have with the limited resources I possess?

It's a miracle.

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