Desert Magnolia

For nearly 3 decades we have been either primarily responsible for, or very supportive of the whole Thanksgiving endeavor. Countless turkeys have been stuffed, potatoes roasted, cranberries chopped and served fresh or cooked, green beans sacrificed (sometimes stir fried gently w/garlic and butter, sometimes incorporated into the famous green bean casseroles so frequently requested, pies constructed with love, and stuffing recipes perfected in this effort. This year, we went away. We opted to loop out of the annual cookfest that usually starts several days prior, and whose dishes require multiple dishwasher cycles and many piles of handwashing to get through. We went to Ruidoso, to Inn of the Mountain Gods, and acted like the guests that we were. We headed down on Wednesday, early, and hubby played golf. I went into town and got some lunch, then a manicure while he whacked little white balls across gorgeous fairways beneath scenic mountains. We relaxed, we enjoyed several restaur...

Albert Einstein's definition of insanity - repeating the same action and expecting a completely different outcome - seems to be the theme for the holidays this year. Thanksgiving turned out to be ok - which was good. The energy vamp chose to surf the 'Net after dinner, simply avoiding all contact with us, so that meant the rest of us chatted and enjoyed dessert and relaxed a little. At one point during the evening I looked around at the faces, all familiar, all part of a complex family drama and personal evolution, devolution, growth and aging.  The young ones are growing up, and will be moved away in a few years. The older ones are getting even older, and mark their days by managing chronic pain and choosing how to focus their resources, which are less than they were even a year ago. And every one of us gathers to celebrate each holiday, to reconnect on whatever level works at that moment, and hopes for some significant easing of tension and angst and underlying dysfuncti...

This year, hubby and I contemplated getting away for Thanksgiving. We entertained the thought of staying in Santa Fe, enjoying a lovely meal out, walking around the plaza, and mostly NOT dealing with the family political dynamic that has plagued recent (ok, at least the last 10 if not more) Turkey Day celebrations. The fact that our kids will not be home adds to the feeling of liberation - there is no tradition to uphold if they aren't here, right? In fact, daughter and her boyfriend will be in Italy this year. Italy. Touring, eating the most amazing foods and drinking Italian wine. They're even taking a cooking class in Tuscany while they're there. They'll be having an incredible, romantic time, and doing what you should do - which is enjoying the event. Son is too far away to come home for Thanksgiving, but will be home for Christmas, which warms my mama heart to its very core. He will be celebrating with friends in Abu Dhabi, and will most likely host - he is the ch...

It's the morning after. Not of a steamy love connection (unfortunately), but the morning after two weeks of intensity the likes of which I hope not to experience again any time soon. Let me explain. I already talked about finals, and wow, after my 9th round of them (yep, I've done this 9 times now!, only 6 to go....) I'm as used to them as I'm going to get. In other words, they're crazy hard and there's a ton of pressure to do well, as we would expect. Part of the trick, I think, is knowing what's coming...again and again and again....sometimes that can be harder than walking into something blind, don't you think? So there were finals, and now they are done. Because life wasn't already full/intense/stressful enough, a hot water pipe decided to burst under our living room. Which is, of course, on a concrete slab. Which needed to be, yes...jackhammered up. Again. (This happened once before, a mere 6 days before daughter's 18th birthday, ...

I don't know where the year has gone, I just don't. There have been many many happenings, some good, some neutral, some shitty, but mostly everything has gone super fast. Super. Fast. Maybe it's the turning 50 thing. Maybe it's the being in school thing. Maybe it's the leaving the company I have been with since Day 2 and becoming a consultant. (Which, by the way, I think is for grownups and I really, apparently, don't view myself that way most of the time. Go figure.) Maybe it's the fact that each day is packed with more than I can possibly manage well, so there is much juggling taking place. In any case, we're here. The week before Christmas, and all through the house...we're waiting for Son to come home so we can set up the tree and decorate. Daughter got in Saturday night, which was amazing and I realized I NEVER want to go so very long EVER again without seeing that girl. EVER. Son is currently in Amsterdam blowing off some steam and...

As weeks go, this one has had its moments. Fortunately, most of those moments have resolved without too much bloodshed. Which, I'm sure we all agree, is a good thing. While it's not over yet, I'll venture to say that there's a good chance it will finally come to a fucking end about this time tomorrow... Between now and then, though.. Tonight's shows. Grey's. Lots going on there. Can Meredith hold onto that baby? Will the surgery work for Mc Dreamy? Will Yang really divorce Owen? Did Owen ask for a divorce to keep Yang in the lawsuit? Yes, lots there. Also, and I thank you JL for continuing to entice me with the new Scandal drug until I am now officially hooked. Ahem.  WTF? I mean, come ON....it's always way over the top and I LOVE it. Tomorrow. Meeting in the morning, which, should go ok, but really? Anything can, does, and has happened in those stupid things so I'm just going to do yoga in the morning and act unsurprised no matter what come...

Simple things are truly what make life rich and wonderful. In fact, some days, the simple stuff is all that keeps me from running screaming from the room. Seriously. Like, when my friend JL would do her silly happy dance as she walked by my office door. That would jolly me out of any stress out I could conjure. Every single time. Like when Son called yesterday and announced he'd be joining us in Mexico for the holidays. Woot! So now our fam will be complete plus 1 sweet friend of Daughter's...laying on the beach, contemplating whether it's time to apply more sunscreen. Or or to reach for a cold beer or order a chilly marg. You know, that kind of stuff. Easy. Like Daughter and I spending time at our hair stylist's yesterday afternoon. Sipping a glass of wine, getting our 'dos done. Then shopping, and actually finding a cute pair of boots and some darling jeans for the girl. Like dancing in the kitchen..while listening to Tom Petty, laughing with my girl, p...

It's Thanksgiving Eve, and all through the house not a creature is stirring...oh wait, wrong holiday, but it's all coming together. 'It' being baking and prepping and bonding and generally settling in for a family event. Today included, but wasn't limited to: Breakfast Making NY Style cheesecake (came out looking very yummy) Going for a most amazing jog in the balmy warm early afternoon Hanging out with the girl..catching up, talking about life, college, boys, friends, etc. Taking a nap Baking pumpkin pie with the girl Relaxing and writing a blog post while G.G. and daughter work in the kitchen (dinner- G.G.'s famous green chili patty melts on rye-ummmmy!) Catching up on Modern Family (daughter) and watching other fun silly entertainment just because we can. That's pretty much it so far, but if this is any indicator of how the weekend is going to go, we're in a most amazing place. Happy Thanksgiving and big hugs to everyone!

G.G. and I have been discussing just what needs to happen for the upcoming extravaganza at our casa, and mostly we're on the same page, which is nice. Because then we don't have to go through the fight and make up cycle while we're getting ready to host Thanksgiving. That cycle? Exhausting. Anyway, our menu currently looks like this...which, if you've seen my prior menus, is a little leaner. Kind of, but not in a material way... Turkey (herbed) Stuffing Gravy Twice baked sweet potatoes Garlic green beans Garlic mashed potatoes Cranberry relish, fresh Biscuits Mimosas Wine Cider w/cinnamon sticks Cheesecake Pumpkin pie w/whipped cream Apple or Cherry pie w/ice cream Coffee or tea or maybe brandy Did I miss anything? With any luck it will be nice out, and we can toss the football around after dinner/during halftime of the football game. That makes Turkey Day just about perfect. Well, that and a good family feud over who gets the last dollop o...

So the Friars made it to the second round of the Big East Tournament this year, which is fabulous. They hadn't been to the tournament since 1994, so just getting there was cool. As was beating Rutgers in the first round, but not so much losing to Louisville in the second. But that's how soccer goes-there are highs, there are lows, there is brilliant strategy, there are accidental great moments and unbelievably low moments, from a morale standpoint, but mostly there is no end of drama and second guessing and generally just thinking about it. All the time. Until the season is over. So the season is over. Daughter assisted with some good goals, and made one of her own, her very first college goal and the only one scored in the game to advance her team to the tournament, which was super cool. She'll never forget that moment, ever in her entire life. And she's coming home for Thanksgiving-not something we were certain of until we heard her homesick voice again in a pho...

And I'm not referring to my bra. Come to think of it, well, never mind that. After a long Skype session with my son yesterday afternoon in which we discussed a myriad of topics, and during which I realized how amazing and observant and intelligent and compassionate and awe.some that kid is, again, I felt blessed and delighted and just, happy. And I took that happiness and warmth with me, shared it with Hubby, enjoyed a dinner of grilled rosemary pork chops, a butter lettuce/artichoke hearts/grape tomatoes/red onion/Persian cucumber salad dressed with a sweet lemon vinaigrette and a nice Pinot Noir, and settled in for Thursday night TV. Hubby surfed between baskteball games and our favorite sitcoms, the evening was balmy, the cat was friendly, and the term 'content' kept surfacing in my consciousness. And then about 930 p.m. my brotherinlaw called to ask if he could swing by the house for a sec, to 'drop some stuff off.' To which I replied 'of course!...

I thought my days of being sappy, hormone-ridden Mama were kind of over. But I was wrong. Yesterday Daughter arrived for her holiday stay. Exhausted, but happy. It was a good first semester. And she loves Providence. We had a fun dinner, relaxed a little, then she went to visit her boyfrien'. Who misses her a lot. And ditto her him. We joked about being home by 3 if possible...because once your college kid returns you don't apply the same curfew pressure anymore, you just hope they make good decisions and get their butts home before the bars close and all the idiot drunks are out in force. So when the doorbell rang around 115 a.m., I was a little afraid. A little miffed (to be awakened from a sound, sound sleep.) A bit perplexed. After all, Daughter was driving my car, and my car has a garage door opener in it meaning she wouldn't need to come to the front door to get in unless she had forgotten where I keep that opener..which she wouldn't. See what I mean? ...