Silent contemplation and brain stretching

Daughter left on Sunday morning, which meant my Sunday afternoon was kind of without its normal abundance of oxygen...This always happens, and I can say that my recovery period is getting shorter and the breathlessness is becoming less suffocating. But it still happens, and I suspect it probably always will.

After I dropped her at the airport I ran some errands, then went home and went for longest, hardest run I'd gone on since before our trip. The air was balmy, in fact I ran in shorts and a sweatshirt. The sun on my face felt calming and soothing and the slight breeze kept me from regretting choosing the sweatshirt over a lighter technical shirt....

Arm work, ab work and stretching followed the run. And a shower, of course.

And once I was cool and clean, I decided to sit...quietly, for about twenty minutes, in the sunbeam shining into our living room. I felt a soft settling, an internal acceptance of the new now, almost like a sigh from my soul, and a sense of peace came over me that has lingered since.

Daughter is back at school, G. G. is back from his soccer conference in KC, and life is settling into the normal.

The new normal, as it turns out? Is feeling like a really great place to be.

Comments

It might have been the moon

The second Super Moon, also a Harvest Moon, just happened. On the same night I had my mini-meltdown. (see prior post). I've talked with several friends who reported intense emotions, mostly around stuff that needs to be released, resolved. When I think about my angst, and how intense it felt, I realize it was all about that kind of stuff. Old stuff, patterns, thinking, habits. So maybe the moon precipitated things. The bubbling up of angst and anger and icky stuff lasted all that night, but had calmed by yesterday morning. Thank gawd, because that was a morass of darkness, the likes of which I haven't experienced in at least a decade. The rest of the weekend has been pleasant. Uneventful. Full of errands, chores, a really nice walk this morning, yummy food, naps, etc. The one thing about energy that feels constant is that no mood lasts forever. Energy continually shifts and morphs, like the Universe knows too much, too long, of any one sentiment just isn't a good idea for ...

Running Shoes...with Waves

Remember when you had one pair of tennies and they were for everything? Everything. Those days ended for me in high school when I started to run in earnest. In Nike Pegasus, their original running shoe, in white leather with a red swoosh. They were cushiony and durable and made me feel like less of a poser and more like a real runner. After that the style options exploded. I can't remember when Nike came out with their patented Air technology, but I had one of the original pairs..paid a ton of money for them, but it was money well spent. I ran all over the place in those things. All over. The foothills, the valley, sidewalks, parks, around the Academy, wherever...many miles in the originals. Generations of shoes later, I find myself not so happy with the Nike anymore. I've spent thousands of dollars on them in my life, but a few years back began to notice what I deemed to be a general decline in quality, though they've never stopped increasing their prices with ea...

My evolution as a practitioner

When I graduated from Oriental Medical school I had some preconceptions about what my life would be like as a practitioner. I envisioned a hectic but rewarding practice, the daily rigors of balancing the art of medicine with the business of business, and a sense of constant growth and development as both a physician and a human. Those preconceptions were spot on, but with a stutterstep in between graduating and practice that was comprised of endless board exams study/completion, continual self-doubt during the board gauntlet (was I really cut out for this? could I really get through all of the silly exams without doing permanent brain damage? would I ever be able to pay back the ginormous loans I'd amassed during school? etc.), then, finally, licensing. After which realities present that require contemplation and action (or nonaction if you prefer.) Where to practice? How to make a living while a practice grows? To accept insurance? Deciding to practice with former school col...

Desert Magnolia

Search This Blog