Skip to main content

Baklava as balm

Grandma Gin is a pip.

She's mending, getting restless, almost headed for rehab today, has been micromanaging the medical team like nobody's business, and is, in general, heading in the right direction.

Once I had taken care of a couple of her requests at lunch, including locating and recruiting the very patient and capable nurse tech who has been at Grandma's beck and call for several days now to help her back into her bed from her lunch chair, things got quiet.

I turned off one of the lights in her room to make it a little more peaceful, we chatted about the clouds building in the distance, covered the stuff pertaining to her immediate comfort and forseeable future, and mostly just chilled a little.

I tucked her blanket around her, and stroked her arm a bit, and could feel her relax into what would become her early afternoon nap.

Before she faded, though, she said,'Honey, you're clearly working too hard. You have big dark circles under your eyes. You need a nap, and to take some more time to live your life instead of just build that company.'

I responded. 'Gram, I always have dark circles under my eyes, it's my Middle Eastern heritage. And I'm really not working too much, just trying to make sure the important stuff gets done.'

Averse to not having the last word, she continued. 'Yeah, but those circles are worse than usual and really, when you're my age are you going to be thinking about the things on your To Do lists you didn't accomplish or regret not having more time for hobbies and relaxing and your garden?'

Well, hell, Gram. How am I supposed to know that?

And unfortunately as delicious as the baklavah is accompanied by a lovely Sumatra coffee? It's not really doing the trick.

What I may really need is some therapy. Seriously. To deal with what I've clearly been missing.


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Dang it's hot

It has decided to be summer now, after weeks of fluctuating between cool and cooler.... The A/C is on high. I am trying to study, but really don't want to ...due to a general weightiness that has settled over me, no doubt the heat is just slowing me down for the moment. So, instead of pressing through and forcing myself to do something I don't really have the energy to do right now I am honoring my state of mind and just relaxing a little.... I have begun serious study for my BioMed exam, and reviewing the material is making me realize that I have in fact learned a great deal during my journey through this program, but more importantly is I have begun to look at things, all things, differently.  I am not sure when it began, the shift to this new view, but it has taken hold and infuses my being with an appreciation for the beauty and complexity of life, of the human body, of the human condition, of the universe in general. I have learned facts and data, I have examined ca...

The choices we make, make us who we are, don't they?

W. H. Auden once said: Choice of attention—to pay attention to this and ignore that—is to the inner life what choice of action is to the outer. It's so easy to get caught up in the day to day that we often forget that every single choice that we make, particularly when it comes to how we live, not just the little niggling details, really matters. Every single one. I guess it boils down to limited resources, right? There are a finite number of moments in each day, and most of us are obligated to spend a considerable number of those pursuing our careers, making ends meet, etc., which means that the number available for spiritual and emotional nurturing are limited, indeed. So demonstrating our love for our families, taking good care of ourselves-nutritionally, emotionally, spiritually, physically, in the moments we actually have for those pursuits? Makes absolute sense. And growing our hearts and enriching our spirits through whatever means we choose, be it spending more ...

On Mondays. And lots of rules.

Mondays can be a challenge. There's the whole shock to the system of waking up and realizing it's not the weekend anymore, which kind of blows. And then the jolt out of the lazy flow of the weekend into the time-focused 'gotta be at the office by x time, gotta get ready for the company meeting, gotta check emails/deadlines to ensure nothing is on fire' stuff. And then the reality of settling into the week...and knowing that this one will be a full one. They all seem to be. This week for me: Work. Lots of good stuff going on, but 'lots' being the watchword. School. 2nd trimester starts. Tomorrow a.m. So tomorrow for me is school, 9-12; work 1230-430; clinic 5-9. Long day, Tuesday. For this I've washed and pressed my lab coat, cleaned out my tote (it is truly amazing what collects during a trimester in terms of used kleenexes, abandoned index cards, folded notes that were important at some point but now are just extra weight, stale snacks, etc.), and ...