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A Halloween retrospective, or bad costume choices through the years

Halloween has never been my favorite holiday. Some of my friends go absolutely bonkers over it, and begin planning costumes in early summer. I'm not one of them, and chuckle when I think of some of the costumes I've donned in my life.

As a kid I usually went the pirate, hobo, and gypsy route. Later on, though, well, things started to get a little sillier.

There was the year I went as a Hershey's kiss. Seriously. Complete with chocolate 'perfume'. Now that was something...brown Danksin leotard from head to toe, kiss foil 'body' with a big hoop at the bottom so it really looked like a kiss shape, white tab sticking out the top. It was hilarious. Hard to go to the bathroom, but somehow I managed..and I giggled when everyone started craving chocolate if they stood by me for more than a minute. That chocolate extract I used as perfume brought out the chocolate hound in the best of 'em.

Dolly Parton was next. Blonde wig,  gold lame sleeveless vest and flared hip huggers over gold heels. All way too tight, lips seriously glossy, fake eyelashes ridiculously full and dark. I even adopted a Tennessee twang (or so I thought) to complete the effect. Hah.

Then came Morticia. 'nuff said.

At some point I became a geek, and actually agreed to be a character from Pong. Again, 'nuff said. We thought we were pretty funny, though, the Pong team. That's all I'm sayin'.

For some reason, perhaps in reaction to the Pong experience, the following year was a vavoomy year. I found a gorgeous mermaid costume that fit like, well, skin. It was shimmery and fun and light and...as it turned out, very see through. I would have died if I'd known that as I was standing in front of a window during a big office gathering that afternoon that nothing was left to anyone's imagination.

Crap. Fortunately, I didn't find this out for several years, when a former colleague of mine and I were laughing over antics we'd witnessed at that company and it came up. Really?! I still blushed, but I don't think a post-event blush really counts for much in the big scheme.

My kids, they've done a great job as ninjas, various cartoon characters, popular literature figures (Harry Potter is this year's theme, actually), Star Wars characters, Risky Business theme, etc. And they're always good.

They'll look back, though, one day, and have themselves a retrospective moment, I'm guessing. You just can't play that many characters without a backstory to tell at some point, right?

This year we're low-keying the whole event, and going to a party with friends. Nobody is dressing up, unless you count donning bathing suits to sit in the hot tub.

Happy Halloween!

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