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Showing posts with the label life in isolation

Tired

Months into this, I find myself just...bone tired.  Tired of the conversations.  Tired of the reality of daily fear layered over the reality of yearning for a quality life.  Tired of the politicization of a terrible health crisis.  Tired of the buildup to an election, the results of which hold our futures in balance - darkness and light are at work, this time.  Tired from being upbeat and supportive and so very very positive with each of my patients each and every treatment, day after day.  Tired from an endless summer of oppressive heat, big wind, very little rain.  Tired of being tired.   I really really want to take a deep breath, awaken one morning without the crashing realization, a few seconds after waking, that life is super complicated, rather dangerous, and without many of the simple opportunities I've come to take so much for granted.  I want to be able to hug freely, meet casually, feel a sense of lightness, and gather in casu...

I've become a reluctant groomer

It has come to my attention that I am lazy when it comes to grooming, these days. Let me be clear - I always wash up, via sink baths and such, but have spent less quality time immersed in or under a stream of hot water in the last two weeks. I'm not sure why this is, but feel that 'adjusting to the new normal', wherein we socialize virtually and isolate intentionally to slow the spread of this horrid virus, plays a role. I don't like change, I guess, and this reality represents change on a level my generation hasn't yet experienced. Until now. I've also noticed that when I do groom, I kinda go over the top with it. I seem to be an all or nothing girl right now. I'm either fully plucked, shaved, exfoliated, moisturized, mascaraed, lipsticked, perfumed, or I'm pretty raw. Always flossed and brushed, always wearing deodorant (I'm not an ANIMAL, y'all), always moisturized and possibly SPFd, but the plucking and shaving stuff...seems to be less...