Skip to main content

Elegance and grace

 As I settle into my second year of practice, I am becoming more comfortable with the medicine overall, and am feeling continually blessed to be in a place where I can participate in journeys to better health and well being.

Each day brings challenges, opportunities to test my abilities as a practitioner, and conversations about life, love, health, wellness and managing obstacles along the way. I am continually impressed by how patients cope, how they overcome their unique health issues, and how the medicine seems to support their efforts to improve.

Some days the intensity of multiple patients with intense back stories or clearly nuanced and complex lives and circumstances leaves me exhausted, emotionally.  Therapeutic distance is a beautiful ideal that we're encouraged to employ; the reality is sometimes, often when I 'm physically taxed at the end of a long day or week, applying that ideal of distance becomes a challenge.  When the energy that fuels my barriers is low, sometimes stuff gets to me that usually doesn't. Which requires rest, reassessment, and usually sharing my feelings with those close to me who are kind enough to let me vent, and to help me heal as a result.

Occasionally a patient passes from this life. The passing may be unexpected, or at the end of a long journey of illness, but when they leave....it feels like a blow to the midsection with a medicine ball - one of the heavy, leather ones that we had in elementary school. Several weeks ago, one of my dear, brave, lovely patients left this plane of existence after struggling mightily against a particularly aggressive form of cancer. News of her death didn't surprise me, as we had known she was declining, but the medicine ball thing, well, it's real. 

As I sit with the feelings this loss has elicited, I realize that the sacred relationship between a patient and a practitioner allows for incredibly honest conversations where insights into the deepest thoughts and feelings are gleaned. Anything can surface at these times, and life philosophies, regrets, joys and sorrows number among the topics that bubble up. I also realize that the lessons to be learned from those who know their days are numbered are innumerable. This patient, regardless how low her energy became, or how poorly she felt, would always arrive with a pretty pedi. Her favored shade was Candy Apple Red, and she always grinned when I noticed and complimented her on how pretty her toes looked.

She said, "You know, I think we all have to hold onto a little something that makes us feel good, particularly when we're dealing with challenging circumstances. There is nothing wrong with wanting to feel pretty while wrangling the ugly beast that is cancer."

I agree.

And once I'd gathered my thoughts and taken a deep breath after news of her passing had arrived, I went for a pedi. A red one. Candy Apple Red. In her honor.

Each day presents many opportunities for learning, for becoming a better human.  This lovely lady demonstrated incredible elegance and grace up to the end of her time on Earth. I thank her for allowing me to be a small part of her journey. Knowing her was a blessing, and her lessons shared I will hold near and dear forever more.

Hugs and best wishes,

Stevie

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Dang it's hot

It has decided to be summer now, after weeks of fluctuating between cool and cooler.... The A/C is on high. I am trying to study, but really don't want to ...due to a general weightiness that has settled over me, no doubt the heat is just slowing me down for the moment. So, instead of pressing through and forcing myself to do something I don't really have the energy to do right now I am honoring my state of mind and just relaxing a little.... I have begun serious study for my BioMed exam, and reviewing the material is making me realize that I have in fact learned a great deal during my journey through this program, but more importantly is I have begun to look at things, all things, differently.  I am not sure when it began, the shift to this new view, but it has taken hold and infuses my being with an appreciation for the beauty and complexity of life, of the human body, of the human condition, of the universe in general. I have learned facts and data, I have examined ca...

On Mondays. And lots of rules.

Mondays can be a challenge. There's the whole shock to the system of waking up and realizing it's not the weekend anymore, which kind of blows. And then the jolt out of the lazy flow of the weekend into the time-focused 'gotta be at the office by x time, gotta get ready for the company meeting, gotta check emails/deadlines to ensure nothing is on fire' stuff. And then the reality of settling into the week...and knowing that this one will be a full one. They all seem to be. This week for me: Work. Lots of good stuff going on, but 'lots' being the watchword. School. 2nd trimester starts. Tomorrow a.m. So tomorrow for me is school, 9-12; work 1230-430; clinic 5-9. Long day, Tuesday. For this I've washed and pressed my lab coat, cleaned out my tote (it is truly amazing what collects during a trimester in terms of used kleenexes, abandoned index cards, folded notes that were important at some point but now are just extra weight, stale snacks, etc.), and ...

May I please be excused?

When G.G. was sorting through the mail the other night he stopped, then started to chuckle. And then he handed me an envelope in which a Jury Summons was contained. He chuckled because he has been called twice, and I have never been called. And for some reason he thought that wasn't right, or fair, or something. Well, I got mine. But it turns out I need to ask them a favor. To postpone my civic duty until after the holidays. Because before the holidays I am responsible for planning and overseeing and/or executing all year end marketing and PR for our little company, as well as publishing our final edition of an e-pub that now distributes to over 300K people each edition, so it needs to look good. And not have spelling errors and stuff. And then when that e-pub flies? I'll be flying, literally, to Providence, then to Europe and the Middle East. There's a lot to get done before I go, and I'm desperately hoping that our jury management system accepts my reque...